ScarfWatch 2012

One of the aspects of moving cross country that I did not anticipate was that I was moving just in time to throw myself directly in the path of Sandy, the giant superstorm. Now back home we have disasters, but they're usually in the form of earthquakes, and while you don't get a lot of time to prep for them, you also don't have 3 days of anxiety provoking buildup. 

I was really fortunate not to have any damage, and to have power- the things I'm seeing on the news are really terrible and I feel truly lucky. But, now I have 3 days off of work and I'm going a little nuts. While I was out picking up batteries and water bottles and such I grabbed some knitting needles and yarn on a whim (I had some before and I gave them to Goodwill in a fit of despair after trying and failing multiple times to make anything).

So, optimistically, I got started, imagining myself clicking away cozily while drinking tea and listening to the wind:

After watching the entirety of 'Lars and the Real Girl' and 'My Blue Heaven' against the background of me swearing and yelling 'why, why won't you work!' at the needles, this is what I had:

Hmmm.

Then came the brunt of the storm, and most of my time was spent obsessively watching the news and IMing with people in different places, but through all that news watching as well as 'The Golden Compass' and 'Gone', this is where I am now...

My Mom said maybe it could be a Barbie scarf, and then I'd be done.

Needless to say, I was hoping for a little more progress... and yes the whole bottom is crazy looking and it does have a hole in it. Since I just found out that I have tomorrow off as well I can only hope that I can at least get this thing to washcloth size before Sandy subsides (dare to dream!). Unfortunately I have papers to write and work to be done, but stay tuned for ScarfWatch updates! You never know!

RIP: Presto Pop Lite

I should have been prepared for this day to come, but it is a sobering turn of events, nonetheless. 

This is my faithful air pop popcorn popper, which my Grandma gave me when I was about 7-8 years old when these were pretty trendy*. Without revealing my age, I'll just say that this was at some point in the mid 80s (which is an important piece of information to help prove the longevity of this amazing appliance).

Over the years, it provided many a snack- I love popcorn, but I always burn it in the microwave and the stove, plus this avoids all those chemicals in the microwave stuff and all the oil in the regular stuff. Get a trusty air popper and an olive oil mister, and you're good to go!

At one point I thought that since I used it so much I should invest in a more modern one. But, as it turns out, the technology behind air pop popcorn has remained virtually unchanged- below, you see a modern version available on Amazon:

A little shinier, maybe, but all in all, basically the same. So, I stuck with my trusty old one for a few more years.

Unfortunately, while trying to make a little something to get me through the final hours of grant writing this weekend, the little popper literally went up in smoke. While I'm sad to see it go, at least we had 20+ glorious years together. It is such an elderly popper I almost feel like I should send it back to PopLite for some kind of formal ceremonial burial. At the very least, I can recommend getting one of these things- it's apparently a lifetime investment!

RIP, little popper.


*As a side note, this popper was also the way I first realized the that Santa might not exist- my parents used to put all the presents under the tree after we went to bed, but my Grandparents came by and left some a few days early. My Grandma wanted to be cute and have Santa send me some popcorn to go with the popper. So, under the tree, days before Christmas, boldly sitting there in broad daylight, was a present from Santa. I remember distinctly asking my Mom while she tucked me in about how it got there, and I don't remember what she said, but the seed of doubt was planted. The seed was soon to fully flower when my next door neighbor educated me by accident by saying "your brother doesn't still believe in SANTA does he??" Oh, you're supposed to have 'flashbulb memories' for major historical and tragic events, but that exact moment of that afternoon, standing outside their back door, trying to pretend like I was also too cool for Santa even though I was secretly devastated, was absolutely one for me.

The Amazing Dairy-free, Soy-free, Nursing Mother Friendly, Vegan Friendly, Fancy Chocolate Baptism Cake

***SPOILER ALERT*** this cake is delicious. it also has avocado in it. I am not even kidding.

So, the worlds cutest nephew (WCN) transitioned to being the worlds cutest Godson/nephew a while ago (this post is really really late, and the WCN in question is now 8 months old and crawling like a mad-man, but I kind of forgot to blog about it all in my post cake baking exhaustion. and I knew it would be long, so it's just been sitting here). Anyhow, I wanted to do something special for the event, and so got recruited to make the cake.

Now, WCN had a very sensitive little tummy, and poor WCN's Mom was on a very restricted diet as a result- this mean no dairy and no soy. She didn't request a cake without those things, but it just seemed like it would be too sad if she couldn't eat the cake. So, a search for an appropriate recipe commenced. A recipe for chocolate avocado cake had been kicking around between some of my fellow bakers and I, so I decided to give it a try. 

The stuff:
3c all purpose flour
6 tbsp cocoa powder
.5 tsp salt
2 tsp baking soda
2c sugar
1/4 c vegetable oil (I used canola in one, and coconut oil in another)
1/2c mashed avocado
2c water
2 tsbp white vinegar
2 tsp vanilla extract

What to do with it:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees, grease your pans (either 2 rounds, or 1 9x13)
Sift together dry ingredients, mix wet ingredients, gradually stir dry into wet.
Bake 30-40 min, but defer to a knife or toothpick if you are making a bigger cake.

Now, I'm not going to lie... I was so anxious about the avocado component that I test drove this recipe twice, both times not telling anyone about the secret ingredient until after they already decided that they liked it. Because this was not going to a vegan brunch, this was going to a big, carnivorous party, and it was going to be the only cake. It turns out there was no need- this cake is VERY moist and very chocolatey. It's not just a good cake considering the constraints on the ingredients, it's a good cake in any scenario. I would make it again, any time.

In addition to being anxious about the flavor, I also wanted this cake to be big and to be fancy (this was the WCNs big day, after all, and there is a big family involved). So, the first step was to make 3 9x13 layers, because there were a LOT of people coming. This thing weighed a ton. 

If you want to know how I came up with that amount, I used a handy-dandy cake portion calculator. There were going to be ~50 people there, and the calculator said that 2 9x13 layers serve 45. I didn't want to be skimpy, so I made 3, but really, there was probably 1/3 of the cake left in the end, because this cake is very rich.

So, step one was to stack the layers up. A smarter person than I am would have sliced off the rounded top of each layer so that they stacked flatly without gaps on the side. I used a lot of frosting filling in those innocent little gaps you see there.

The next step is a crumb layer that can cover the edge of the cake and make a barrier between the cake (and its crumbs) and your fancy frosting layer. This is also when you fill in those gaps.

Now, I recommend this cake, hands down. I do NOT recommend my attempt at vegan buttercream. I just took a normal buttercream recipe and used Earth Balance. The issue that happened is that my kitchen was very hot (after baking 3 giant cakes!), and the Earth Balance separated at a lower temperature than butter would have and I the frosting started to separate. This required a trip to the store  at 11pm to start all the frosting over, and also involved actually scraping all the frosting off the cake once. So.... I'm not even going to share the recipe, I suggest finding your own.

After the crumb layer was on, I put in some blue food coloring to make it cute.

Now comes a cool trick I learned- I wasn't about to attempt to make fondant, but given that this was supposed to be fancy I wanted the buttercream to be smooth. I learned that the trick you do is to use paper towels. It sounds weird, but it totally works. Now, if you want completely flat buttercream you need completely flat paper towels, which is actually harder than you think. Viva brand paper towels are totally flat though, so just go for those. If you find a design you like, you can actually make little imprints in the frosting. Of course, I was not about to try this out on the actual cake without testing it first (and, I'm a scientist! obviously I had to test both methods). So, before putting the higher layers on, I tried it on layer 1. These pictures are not that great, but it was almost midnight at this point, so lets just say that lighting was not my top priority.

Basically what you are doing here is "ironing" the frosting, so get something flat. I'm sure there is something more more professional than a tea box, but, it works. Side note- that's my favorite tea.

This is the "viva" paper towel version- so flat!

This is the regular paper towel version, I think this pattern could actually be kind of cool but it would be REALLY hard to implement it well, in terms of matching up seams, getting it even, etc. (also, you can see here that the earth balance buttercream is starting to break down, this is right before I started over with that).

So, after frosting it with blue frosting, 'ironing' it, I made some darker frosting and put it on using a pastry bag. And here it is! 

You can see how the edges are wobbly, if I had sliced the layers so they laid flatter, that wouldn't have happened. I learned a lot though, and will definitely be trying this whole frosting technique again.

AND... noooobody had any idea about the avocado,  my sister and law could eat it, and everyone was happy!

To sum up an excessively long post:
1. this cake recipe is delicious, and I would try it whether or not it needed to be vegan
2. this technique for making buttercream frosting smooth works- it doesn't look like fondant, but it does look better than regular buttercream
3. nephew status: successfully baptized, and adorable

Have a Vampire Problem?

.... then boy, do I have the answer for you!

Things have been pretty stressful around these parts, I'm not gonna lie. So, I'm trying to take advantage of the small things that can make life a little easier. One of those things is grocery delivery... I've never done that before, but there's a service around here that lots of my friends use and I figured, why not.

So, Sunday night I went shopping online and was all excited to get all these things (I'll post the recipe I actually made later in the week). And, one of the things that was there was peeled garlic cloves. I thought, hey, I want life to be easier, why do I need to waste precious time peeling my own garlic (the correct answer to that question is actually something like "because it only takes about 30 seconds, you lazy lazy person"). So I ordered a package and continued happily clicking off boxes and picking out veggies.

Then, it came! And, in amongst everything else was my garlic!

Now, the first thing you might be inclined to say is something along the lines of "wow, now that is a crapload of garlic". I've been watching obscene amounts of old 30 Rock episodes, so I probably said "what the what!" and channeled my inner Liz Lemon.

Anyhow, it's a lot, but whatever, that seemed fine because I'd use it eventually. Until I saw this:

Yes, my friends. It says November 6, 2012. I am a single lady, living alone, and I have less than one month to consume an entire pound of garlic. Help!